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Back to black by Zen Bitchin' on May 20, 2010Whenever I get the blues, the most effective coping mechanism I have is to keep myself busy. This meant immersing myself in household chores (which further meant driving my housekeeper crazy as I gave her directions she must follow to the letter), un...

Cruel summer by Zen Bitchin' on May 17, 2010Last year I was so sure that it was the last year I’d be in Cambodia. But alas, as most best-laid plans go, mine went unheeded and unfulfilled. I found myself stuck in many ways. My home that time increasingly felt like a prison, the jobs I too...

Faith by Zen Bitchin' on Apr 1, 2010three I am an old house, abandoned long ago, My walls no longer whisper secrets, They have sunk deeper into every grain. My doors have ceased to conceal secrets And surprises, the hinges eaten away By time and rust to silent petrifaction. I am a...

Gravity of love by Zen Bitchin' on Feb 17, 2010As I am writing this, I can feel a distinct throbbing on the inside of my right arm. It is not painful, but it is a physical reminder of what I did last Sunday, Valentine’s day. I have written in my previous post my feelings on (with a deliciou...

My funny valentine by Zen Bitchin' on Feb 13, 2010Until now, I still find Valentine’s day to be  a strange holiday. From my childhood I remember that it coincides with Teacher’s day at school, a time when we give flowers and little gifts to our mentors after mass or a short program on t...

Friend(s) of mine by Zen Bitchin' on Feb 10, 2010By some twist of fate, the start of the project I recently acquired was postponed, leaving me with a 2-week gap I had no way of filling with other bits of work, having refused a short assignment in the end of January. Another source of mild irritatio...

The child is gone by Zen Bitchin' on Jan 31, 2010Something remarkable happened to me a couple of days ago. I was logged in Facebook, looking at the wall of status updates of my friends. A name popped up in a friend’s status update comments. A blast from the past. Before I could control myself...

Return to innocence by Zen Bitchin' on Jan 24, 2010I found this in my 16 year-old cousin’s blog over at tumblr. I’m not sure if she wrote this (it looked as if she got it from another blogger–a friend, presumably) or not. I’ve been reading her posts for quite some time now and...

Be happy by Zen Bitchin' on Dec 23, 2009Perhaps the most perplexing thing about whatever-the-hell-I’m-going-through-right-now is my inability to write about the whole experience. This is something I used to do with ease, since I was young. Whenever I felt troubled, disturbed, and con...

Autumn leaves by Zen Bitchin' on Dec 11, 2009About two weeks ago the winds suddenly blew cold in Phnom Penh. Nights began feeling too cold for me to use the a/c in my room. This happened for about a week before becoming balmy and dry like a summer night again. The trees in the small yard facing...